Remembering Barbara Varenhorst (1928-2021)
Getting people to work together, creating a social culture that supports positive relationships, educating the heart to reduce the alienation behind many problems – Barbara Varenhorst dedicated her life to these activities.
Daughter of a Lutheran pastor, Barbara graduated from St. Olaf College in Minnesota, received her master’s degree in student personnel work at Syracuse University, and earned her Ph.D. in counseling psychology from Stanford University in 1964.
Barbara joined the Palo Alto Unified School District as a consulting psychologist in the 1960’s. In 1970 when she received a grant from the state to develop an exemplary guidance program, she asked the students what they needed. The students told her rather than go to the counselors, they would go to their friends for help with personal problems.
“I didn’t want to hear that,” said Barbara. “I wanted to hear that they needed us.” Then she thought, “why not teach them to help their friends?” This was the turning point that changed Barbara’s life.
In 1986 Barbara and a team of colleagues founded the National Peer Helping Association, now known as the National Association of Peer Program Professionals. “Adolescence” according to Barbara, “can be a time of intense loneliness when youth are reluctant to disclose problems to parents. It is critical they have another option, someone with whom to speak. The peer counseling programs, integrated into the school environment, provide a means of getting important and timely assistance.”
Author of Real Friends: Becoming the Friend You’d Like to Have and Peer Ministry: Basic Curriculum, Barbara designed programs to teach youth how to listen, how to care, and how to make better decisions. It is this passion for young people that Barbara infused into the Vesper Society.
Barbara crossed paths with several Vesper Society leaders through the Evangelical Lutheran Church in America and eventually was elected to the Vesper Society board of directors in 1977. Barbara joined the corporate members in 1980. During her 40 years with Vesper Society, Barbara served in many leadership positions, including interim president of Vesper Society from 1996-1999.
One legacy that Barbara leaves behind is her work with the youth in the City of Oakley, one hour east of San Francisco, that eventually led to the creation of the Youth Advisory Council in 2006. This Council focuses on enriching experiences for youth using Search Institute’s 40 developmental assets, and they advise the City on policies that pertain to youth in the community.
At Vesper’s 50th anniversary banquet in July 2015, it was a joy to see Oakley youth representatives express their gratitude to Barbara. And now it is our turn to say thank you to Barbara for her inspirational dedication and service to Vesper Society. We will miss her dearly.
Barbara died on February 24, 2021 at the age of 92. Arrangements are currently pending. We send our sincere sympathies to Barbara’s family and friends.